Responsibility to yourself

Happy October! Fall is here. Leaves are changing colors, sweaters are coming out, and school is in session. So, I was reading for my women studies class (which I suggest is a class everyone should take, I love it) and I found a very interesting part in one of the readings. I want to share this piece because I feel it is important and something we should live by.

“Responsibility to yourself means refusing to let others do your thinking, talking, and naming for you; it means learning to respect and use your own brains and instincts; hence, grappling with hard work. It means that you do not treat your body as a commodity with which to purchase superficial intimacy or economic security; for our bodies and minds are inseparable in this life, and when we allow our bodies to be treated as objects, our minds are in mortal danger. It means insisting that those to whom you give your friendship and love are able to respect your mind.
Responsibility to yourself means that you don’t fall for shallow and easy solutions: predigested books and ideas, weekend encounters guaranteed to change your life, taking “gut” courses instead of ones you know will challenge you, bluffing at school and life instead of doing solid work, marrying early as an escape from read decisions, getting pregnant as an evasion of already existing problems. It means that you refuse to sell your talents and aspirations short, simply to avoid conflict and confrontation. And this, in turn, means resisting the forces in society, which say that women should be nice, play safe, have low professional expectations, drown in love and forget about work, live through others, and stay in the places assigned to us. It means that we insist on a life of meaningful work, insist that work be as meaningful as love and friendship in our lives. It means, therefore, the courage to “different”; not to be continuously available to others when we need time for ourselves and our work; to be able to demand others – parents, friends, roommates, teachers, lovers, husbands, children- that they respect our sense of purpose and our integrity as persons…. Once we begin to feel committed to our lives, responsible to ourselves, we can never again be satisfied with the old, passive way.”